Feb Brewner Update

It seems a lot has been going on. 

FIRST, Andrew is doing well.  He is starting to grab things and put them to his mouth.  He is a happy baby and very laid back.  He loves his jumperoo and laughing at his brothers.  He really only eats during nap time and through the night……we call him our binge eater.  lol  He is still sleeping in our room.  He is such a joy and a blessing!!!!

Hunter has a new trick!  He can climb out of his crib now and likes to often!!!!  He is a good boy, though, and doesn’t totally destroy his room….yet!  Although I did find him and Ryan in the book nook one day during nap time amidst hundreds of books and stuffed animals!!!!  Took a while to clean that one up!!! Hunter is starting to recognize colors and shapes, can count to 10, and has a rapidly increasing vocabulary.  He is our serious guy, but he sure does make us laugh…..often!!!!

Ryan has been doing very well with chores and saving money.  He was able to buy his first toy with his own money, a stormtrooper, and has already lost it!  lol He also tithed at church for the first time.  J We are still working with him on his behavior, but with God’s grace, we are moving forward and finding joy, even with the continuous correction and discipline.  He is a joy and a blessing to our family and has so much life and a huge smile! 

Sean of course is busy with school!  He is amazing and still finds time to be an awesome husband and father, even when he forgets to put the carafe back in before making a pot of coffee! 

I am occupied with the children and the house.  School is keeping me fairly busy, especially as I am tackling the required 45 volunteer hours at the community center for one of my classes.  I have been going all day on Saturdays while Sean has the boys.  I have completed 19 hours.  A little bit more to go! 

As I posted before, my grandma is in the hospital.  She needs a total hip replacement, which was scheduled for Wednesday, but is now rescheduled for Monday because she has pneumonia. Please pray for her. 

LASTLY, Sean and I are working through something that I want to share with others because if we can learn and grow from our experiences and show God’s grace, love, and power, then it makes these experiences so much more worthwhile.  Sean confessed on our anniversary last Tuesday that he has been struggling with his thoughts and with what he allows his eyes to see.  We were watching Fireproof and I jokingly asked if he has ever had a problem with pornography (like the character in the movie) and I was shocked when he said yes.  He has been engaging in this on and off throughout our whole marriage.  I had no idea.  I felt so sick to my stomach, angry, hurt, devastated, but relieved and glad that he told me.  For so long I have felt that something has been wrong in our marriage, but I could never put my finger on exactly what it was.  I have felt it was me for so long.  That I have been doing something wrong.  That I was a bad wife.  The lying and trust issues are hard, but we have put certain things in place to help with that.  We put filters on our computers and got rid of romance novels (no more Nicholas Sparks!!!!!) and movies that show things that could lead to wrong thoughts and temptations.  We changed the music we were listening to from worldly Christian music to classic hymns. We have designated about 8 channels that are acceptable for viewing on TV.  We have ensured that whoever is on the Internet has a buddy.  We have committed to be each other’s accountability partners and daily share our thoughts and feelings.  We have gotten some great resources from Pastor Bates and his wife and we have started watching those.  They are amazing.  Paul and Jenny Speed.  http://witministries.com/ We apologized to the children for trying to teach them obedience, honesty, and self-control when daddy wasn’t practicing the very things he’s trying to teach.  I have asked for forgiveness for my anger, bitterness, and control issues.  I have committed to being a more loving wife and to think of my husband before myself or the children.  We have decided not to keep it a secret because sin is in secrecy.  Also, this blog is about our family, the ups and the downs!  However, none of these things will matter if we don’t have God and if we aren’t willing to do whatever it takes to make this better.  I am excited!  I am encouraged!  I know God is going to do something great in our lives and make our marriage so much better than it could have ever been before.  I am looking forward to seeing what God is going to do and how he will show his glory and power.  I was very naïve.  I didn’t understand how much these things effect men and how tempting this can be for them.  Women, for the most part, don’t have these types of struggles.  It ranges from the temptations on the Internet, to TV programs that show inappropriate relationships between man and woman, to a pretty girl on campus with short shorts and a tank top.  These can all lead to desires that cannot be fulfilled.  God’s timing is perfect, as well.  A few years ago, I would have had a totally different reaction than now.  It’s exciting to know that we are growing in Christ.  I am proud of Sean for mustering up the courage to tell me instead of catching him or him going down an even worse road.  We will be able to rebuild our marriage with God’s mighty strength.  Hopefully through this we can be a blessing to others.  That’s really what it’s all about. 

 

Philippians 4:8

King James Version (KJV)

⁸ Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.