Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Sienna Travel System

Well, we got a stroller/car seat system today with a free extra base. We just got the best deal of the century. we Dave Ramsey'ed it! So, my friend called this morning saying she saw an ad for Sears for the system, regularly priced $260, on sale for $130, so a savings of $130, plus the free base, which was $50, so $180 in savings, plus the one we wanted was $10 more, so a grand total of $190 in savings. So, my friend went to the mall to get it. They were all sold out, but said we could purchase it on-line. Well, we couldn't, so I called customer service and they found it at a mall in St. Pete, put it on hold for me and my friend went and picked it up! My grandma is buying it for us, so really we saved her lots of money. We are really happy!

Here it is:

http://sears.shoplocal.com/sears/default.aspx?action=entryflash& - just look under nursery column on left hand side and it is the Sienna travel system.

or you can see the pattern better on

Speaking of granny, please pray for her. She went to the ER by ambulance on Friday for impacted bowels. She is at home now and doing better, but still having a rough time.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Navigate to the bottom of my blog!

La la la la la la la - La Quinta

We had a nice relaxing weekend, but I guess that's pretty much expected these days! Sean had off all weekend, which was very nice. We watched a lot of movies. Sandra came by on Friday and brought me a big fluffy pillow with a silk pillowcase, an angel necklace, some nice hair products and some comfy prego pants. What a sweetheart! My dad came both weekend days. :) Allie is still very slow about eating her food. Poor puppy dog. Barbie came to visit on Saturday and today. We even got all our laundry picked up and cleaned for us. So thankful. Barbie got to see an u/s with us. Yesterday, Janice from church came to visit and brought us McFlurries and her sister baked us a casserole that is quite tasty. We also got a bunch of notes from people at church.

We got our taxes done on Friday. We switched to a new accountant b/c the one we were using in Cali would not return our phone calls regarding the stimulus checks we never received. Well, the new accountant (my whole family uses him) was able to get our stimulus checks - yay! But there is bad news. First of all, the old accountant was doing our forms illegally, that's why we didn't get our stimulus checks and why she never called us back. Our new accountant was confident that we would not be audited. So any how, after all the deductions he could possibly give us, including our stimulus checks (all legally of course), we still owe $1200. It's because of my transcription job. I was still doing that until June. My boss did not take taxes out of our checks. Somehow from Jan-June, I made $20,000. Why did I quit!?

I did not feel good yesterday. I had really bad stomach pains and contractions. I had not gone to the bathroom since Friday; finally did today. I was put back on continuous monitoring for a while and back on IV fluids. I still had some contractions this morning, but I am feeling so much better. Baby was doing great the whole time while I was not feeling well. I was really flushed, too.

I filled out my nursing application, so I will know by the end of summer if I was accepted into the RN program; it starts in January. I am excited and praying I get in.

I didn't get my hair washed by my hubby last night b/c I felt so ill, but I can't wait for that tonight. Now, if only I could get someone to do my nails and wax my bushy brows!

Friday, March 27, 2009

Random Thoughts

Remembering March 5th was one of the scariest days. To see blood was horrifying. To think something was wrong with our little baby, to continue bleeding, for weeks. So much blood. Not knowing if it is going to stop, if baby is OK, if I'm OK, if I will need an emergency C- section, if we will have a preemie in the NICU. Things are 100% better now. I still have to keep my fear in check all the time and put my trust in Jesus Christ.

Is it crazy if we decide not to go back on birth control after our baby is born?

Please say prayers for Mr. Sean. He has been stressed out about the health of me and baby, having to leave us here, having so much responsibility that is usually stuff that I do and also juggling a very busy job. He is such a strong man. He doesn't realize how good of a job he is doing.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Full day

It has been a busy day for me. I woke up, ate breakfast and then went up for ultrasound. Baby was sucking on his toes. It was so cute and we got a pic of it! Then Barbie and Edward came to visit. It was so nice to see them and she brought me a goodie bag full of stuff! How sweet! Including a Bucs outfit for the lil one! I am also now getting mail sent to the hospital for me. HA! I find that funny. Now, I must say, I have officially become a hospital resident. Then, my new friend Jen came over. Her husband's uncle goes to our church. He gave them our number because they went through a very scary situation with their pregnancy and she delivered at 28 weeks. So, any way, we have talked on the phone lots sharing stories and she came to visit and meet me today. We really get along well and they live like 5-10 minutes away from us. YAY, I have a new friend. She is a real sweetheart! So, then I ate lunch and just been doing some other stuff in bed. I am waiting for the Healthy Start lady to come and visit (usually she would visit my home, but obviously that is not possible at this point). Oh yah, so I got mail here, but I didn't say what. Dr. Tyndall (one of the vets at my work) sent me a card and coloring book and crayons. How sweet was that!!?? Baby doing great on monitors and u/s and same today with me - very minimal bleeding. Tummy has been a little achy, probably gassy. Daddy just came to visit!!!! :O)

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Deep thoughts from an inkie

Ellie (the woman who taught our pregnancy class - even though we only made it to 2 classes before all this happened) said something during one of her visits with me that has definitely stuck. She talked about how people are in such a rush to get out of the valley when that is time where you learn the most from God and find a better relationship with Him. It is the place to take the time and turn over stones. Well, I have turned over a ton of rocks!!! Here is what I have learned through all this:

1. No matter how hard I fight it, I am supposed to be a nurse. I have been so scared to fail again because I dropped out of nursing school when I was 21. Other things like boyfriends and drinking were more important, or so I thought. So, now 270 credits later with only an AA in general studies, I am going to apply for nursing school again. That is exactly why I have so many darn credits. I tried to settle for something else, but always lost interest. Goodbye vet tech program, nursing school here I come!
2. Fear is not a spirit from God. I can't be scared of everything. I was so scared every time I went to the restroom that I would start gushing blood again. I finally put my trust in God, knowing that he would take care of me and baby. Of course, that is not my only fear. I have a fear of not having enough money, losing my hubby or loved ones, people not liking me, losing my job, losing the baby, even a fear of having a bad day! I will no longer live in fear.
3. Our family, friends and church family have been so supportive, loving and gone out of their way to help us out, come visit us and call us. I have had visitors that I would never have expected to come see me in the hospital. Same goes with phone calls, the flowers I have gotten, even FB well wishers. We are so grateful. I have learned that the most important thing is to be there for others, especially when they are struggling. I would find it almost a hassle to visit grandma when she was in rehab, or when people at church needed help, etc. Now, I have a totally different outlook. I want to help everyone! Today, Sean went by our house to find our fridge stocked with prepared meals that a couple from our church dropped off (we have never even spoken to this couple before!). Amazing!
4. I refuse to pack my days full of busyness, stress and anxiety. I am going to treat my time as exactly what it is - precious, valuable and something I can't get back. More relaxation is needed and if I don't get my to-do list done everyday, then oh well. It is not a sin to have a sink full of dirty dishes.
5. Sean and I have complained for the last 2 years that we don't have any friends. How ridiculous! See #3. No other explanation needed!
6. Being pregnant, having a baby, being a mother is one of the greatest gifts God could have ever given me and it is sacred and something I will never take for granted. I can't even express the love I feel for our little baby and we haven't even meet him/her yet (we don't even know the sex!).
7. No longer will I be so judgmental. I can be judgmental towards anyone, but in particular I was very harsh when it came to natural births, C- sections, breastfeeding, caring for babies, etc, etc. I have no room to judge, especially when I have not even been through the situation yet. How wrong of me. Becca - I am so sorry. I know we totally got past that, but gosh I am sorry! I should have been excited for you in your every moment, from the beginning to the end, but I was not always and I again am sorry.
8. I cannot, I will repeat, I CANNOT plan childbirth. Yah, it was fun to write out a birth plan with Sean on our road trip to St.Mary's, but its only use has been that it passed time while we were traveling. There is no way to plan this, huh??!! I certainly did not include in my birth plan that I would start bleeding and contracting at 30 weeks, feel as if I could very possibly lose our baby, spend 3 weeks and counting in a hospital, be on strict bed rest and have a C-section. But I am totally happy with where God has me. I wouldn't change it for anything.
9. Having a good attitude in any situation is key. I could definitely be upset over all that has happened and I could be totally stressed over money concerns and hospital bills, not having the nursery completed, and on and on, but why? I am so thankful that baby is still in my belly, we have made it 3 weeks since this happened, baby is healthy and strong, I am feeling good, and I have a wonderful husband and family and friends. I can't even list all the things Sean has done for me, how he helps me wash my hair and give me a bird bath every night, not to mention all the frightening things he has had to see like blood, vaginal exams, days without a shower or makeup, hospital gowns, hospital underwear.......... you get the picture, probably vividly so!
10. The things I will not take for granted anymore and that I will find joy in doing - going to the grocery store, showers, normal clothes, home cooked food, the sunshine and being outside, exercising, going to work, church, being able to run errands and clean around the house, spending time with Allie and taking her for walks, our bed, our date nights. I now know how Sean feels. He had to go without everything we take for granted while he was in Iraq and he appreciates all this stuff so much more, even 3 years later. He does not forget what it was like to go without and neither will I (and I don't even compare to what Sean went through).

I am one stubborn girl and it took God confining me to a hospital bed to get some of these things through my thick skull. Thank you Lord for these lessons and I eagerly await more!! Thank you, too, for keeping our baby safe. We can't wait to be parents and to love and hold our baby (at 37 weeks please!?) and teach baby all about your most gracious love. Oh, and by the way, I will let you take the driver's seat and steer my life, I will scootchie (sp?) on over to the passenger seat, but I will continue to be strong and faithful.

Baby weighs 4 lbs 14 oz as of today! :)

Monday, March 23, 2009

Hospital Living

Things have been going well. I have had very minimal bleeding the last 3 days. :O) Yay for that!!!!! Nothing else really to report. Baby is moving SOOOOO much and starting to wake me up. I love it. Baby was up under my ribs. So at ultrasound today I asked the tech which body part was under my ribs and guess what it is???!!! The butt!!!! Silly baby. So, yah I love all the movement, even if it is uncomfortable, because it means that baby is growing and is getting strong and big!

I got a little lonely this morning when Sean left for work, thinking how am I going to get through this long day of repetition (TV, reading, computer), but then I had a surprise visitor from our church. It was really nice. It is amazing all the support we are getting from our church, our friends and our family! I really am grateful and so is Sean.

Today, I spent oh let's see like all day updating our registry. It was kinda like shopping, but without spending money. My Aunt Tanya bought us really cute clothes, socks, washcloths, towels, etc.

Allie is very depressed and missing us. We gave Dad a sweatshirt with our scent on it and she is loving it, smelling it like crazy and sleeping with it. She is not eating much and is just not doing so great. Poor Allie. I miss her much. :(

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Quicky Update

An ultrasound was done today and now they feel I have placenta previa and not an abruption, which they said was better. They will keep me here until I deliver most likely. They have to continue to monitor me and baby for signs of distress and of course if the bleeding changes and becomes more serious. The specialist would like to see me go to 34 weeks when baby is completely viable, but if I could get to 37 then of course that would be even better. I will have to have a C section no matter what. I am not upset by it because the end result is all the same - we will be able to hold our beautiful baby in our arms and that's all that matters. So, for now, I continue to be an incubator, bed rest, ultrasounds daily, monitor me and baby and be thankful for each day God gives us. I might have to have a blood transfusion and I am trying to decide if I should get a donor's blood or blood from my hubby. I will have to pray about it. They might take me off the IV today because I am seriously putting out 1000 cc of urine every few hours and that is a ridiculous amount!!!!!!

Friday, March 20, 2009

32 weeks and 1 day, in the 8th month!

Hello! I'm still in the hospital. It has been 15 days now. Wow! Baby is doing great. Moving lots. I get an ultrasound daily. I have seen baby grin and blink. So cute. Today he was doing acrobatics!

The doctors say I have an abrupted placenta. They have not seen it on ultrasound, but all signs and symptoms point to it. Other than that, there aren't a lot of answers. I could be here till I deliver or it could heal and I could go home, it could get worse or the bleeding could stay the same, I could have to have a C section or I could deliver vaginally. I did nothing wrong to cause this. I could deliver tomorrow or I could go full-term. They are hoping I get to 34 weeks. They did see something questionable on my ultrasound today. Maybe a tear of the placenta, but they were unsure.

I am doing well. Praying lots, relaxing, enjoying phone calls and visitors, loving when Sean gets here after work, happy baby is healthy, reading, napping, on the computer,etc.

Sean went to a car seat safety class on Wednesday and we got a brand new car seat for 0-40 or 50 pounds!

Grandma had her cleaning lady come and clean our house yesterday. Sean said it looks really good.

So here is to hopefully another day of baby in my belly!

Monday, March 16, 2009

Hospital wing dedicated to me?

A lot has happened since my last post. Everything went well last Saturday and Sunday after leaving the hospital. My mom flew in on Sunday the 8th. So good to see her. She was here until yesterday. I miss her so much. She took such great care of me and baby and did so much for us. She bought baby a bunch of clothes, Bjorn baby carrier, Boppy, Pooh frame and a baby monitor, too. She washed all the baby stuff and framed a picture for us. Most of all though she just took great care of me and it was wonderful to have her here. She will be back again after baby is born and we are at home.

So last Monday I went to work (planned on working 8-1 M-F that week while mom was here). It was going fine until 12:30 rolled around and I started with the heavy bleeding again. We went back to the hospital. Was discharged the next day. Put on strict bed rest until week 37 (I am at week 31 now). Only up to go to the bathroom and to shower. Mama took care of me Tuesday and Wednesday and Thursday. Sean was in Cali on Tuesday and came back late Thursday night for work. Well, Thursday at 12:30 (again!) I started bleeding heavily and passing clots. Went back to Morton Plant. They decided to transfer me back to Bayfront via ambulance. Thank goodness mama was here since Sean was in Cali.

So since Thursday I have been at Bayfront. I have had ultrasounds daily. Baby is wonderful with big cheeks, hair, using breathing muscles, has muscle tone, drinking fluid, blinking. :O) Baby passes the test everyday with an 8 out of 8. The first one they did here they found no amniotic fluid so there was talk of an emergency C section, but every u/s since then has shown amniotic fluid. I have had an IV, lots of blood taken from me and they have put me on different meds. They stopped the Indocin b/c of the initial concern of loss of amniotic fluid. Started Procardia and my blood pressure started running 84/44! Stopped that and now I am on terbutaline. It makes me feel awful, all shaky and jittery, dry mouth, nausea, weak. I have to take it 4 x's a day. Of course worth it for baby. Dizzy still because of low blood pressure.

At first they said I have to go 3 days straight with no bleeding. That hasn't happened yet. I have heard talks today that they might let me go home. I am not sure if that is good news. It is to be at home, but I am so scared it is going to happen again with the heavy bleeding. I am just praying lots. It is scary any way to be sent home being in preterm labor.

Either way, I am still on strict bed rest when I get home. No working. I emailed my teacher to find out about getting a "W" for the class. Everything else in life has been put on hold, as well, but we are OK with it. This is where God wants us and we shouldn't always be in such a rush to get out of the valley - we are learning a lot in this valley.

Our family and friends have visited and called daily so that has been so nice. We feel very loved and like we have a ton of support. We are extremely grateful.

I miss you mama!!!!!!!

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Our scary 3 day hospital stay

This will probably be a super long post. It has been a really rough couple of days.

Thursday morning started out normally. We did Yoga, ate breakfast and were getting into the shower when I noticed there was blood in my pants. We emergency-called my midwife and she said just to come into the office. We got there (with little baby Joel in tow who has bronchitis, poor guy) and they did a pelvic exam. Cervix was closed and no more fresh blood. Did an ultrasound. Baby completely fine. Cervix measured good. Some concern about placenta previa, but didn't think that was the cause of the bleeding. Told OK to go home. Well, I had Joel to babysit and midterms to take, so I was all for that.

Sean dropped me and Joel off and was headed back to work. I had a bowel movement and then noticed that the toilet was filled with blood. We called the doctor back and they said to go straight to labor and delivery at Morton Plant. I was so scared and bleeding so heavily. It was coming out like a urine stream would. We get to labor and delivery and got all signed in. I probably filled the toilet 3 more times with blood. They had me hooked up to baby monitors (which baby was still fine, thank God) and they saw that I was having contractions. They gave me a shot of terbuline or something to stop the contractions (made me feel so jittery and crazy!). It helped for a while, but the contractions started to come back. They gave me a second dose (they can only give 3). The warded them off for a while and the bleeding subsided. Joel was still with us at this point, but his Dad came to get him. So we were there from about 10:30 til about 5 and thinking we might be able to go home. My midwife came and did a pelvic exam, which was so painful, and I was still bleeding. Cervix still closed (not dilated). She went back to report this to Dr. Paolillo. They decided I should stay overnight. So they moved me up to the actual rooms where you deliver, which was nice in a way b/c we really got to test drive a room and all the nurses, since we are planning to deliver at Morton Plant. The nurses are awesome there and the rooms are beautiful. It was not quite the tour we wanted, not that in depth any way, but oh well. So, contractions started again and some bleeding. They gave me the 3rd and final dose of terbuline (?) and then started me on Procardia. Both would keep contractions away for a while, but not completely. Th nurses were consulting with our OB and midwife at each step and they decided to give me an IV, put me on strict bed rest and insert a catheter. WOW, all firsts for me! I had never even overnighted at the hospital, let alone get an IV and cath! They also started giving me steroid injections to speed up baby's lung development in case I went into labor. 30 weeks is definitely not optimal for delivering a baby. My aunt works in the NICU right down the hall from where we were, so she was also coming to visit. The cath was very uncomfortable, they still had the baby and contraction monitors strapped to my belly, the IV, the leg things so I didn't get edema, the pulse thing on my toe, blood pressure cuff monitoring. It was crazy. They came in hourly or half hourly to check on me throughout the night so we got little sleep plus I was so uncomfortable with all that stuff hooked up to me. I still had not felt any of the contractions I had been having at this point. They also did another ultrasound. Baby was still fine, did not look like placenta previa, cervix fine. Ultrasound tech was awful and she almost ripped my catheter out!!!!

Friday, everything changes again. They decide to transfer me by ambulance to Bayfront. Morton Plant is not equipped to deal with 30 weeks and earlier deliveries, but Bayfront is top in the nation with high risk pregnancies and they are also right next door to All Children's Hospital. My OB and midwife felt they had done all they could and it was best for me to be under the care of a perinatologist. There are 3 down at Bayfront who are awesome. I was still having contractions, which now I could feel. In one hour I had 14, which is no good. Most hours I was having about 7, still no good. They were not really painful, but I was not 100% contracting. Just felt like a squeezing, wrapping around sensation. So, I got a bed bath from the nurse and then the ambulance team transported me to Bayfront. Another first. I was feeling very scared for me and baby and for Sean and how he would handle losing me or the baby. I was so scared we would deliver yesterday and lose our precious little baby.

So, we get to Bayfront and everything is so different from Morton Plant. We were waited on hand and foot at Morton Plant- not so at Bayfront. They immediately took me off the magnesium sulfate (oh yah, at Morton Plant I was put on that IV drip to control contractions too). Crazy stuff made me feel so hot. I think I must have had our room at 60 degrees. I even made Sean cold! They took me off the IV fluids. Well I should say the bag emptied and they did not bother to notice or refill it. They let my catheter bag fill to the top without emptying it. They did not let me eat or drink so I had nothing but ice chips from 6:30 a.m. until about 6 p.m. They did not continously monitor me and baby. They stuck us basically in a closet that was at freezer temps. They had residents and doctors in and out that did not work together, but said they were a team. They all made me go over the whole story with each of them. It was just horrible at first. We felt like we went from superior care to inferior care and it was totally the opposite of why were were being sent there in the first place. We got another ultrasound done. We saw hair on baby's head! Baby weighs 4 lbs and 5 oz right now. Completely healthy. Cervix still closed. Placenta fine. No placenta previa. No ruptures. They decided to keep me overnight so I was moved from high risk antepartum to low risk antepartum and got an actual room that was pretty nice. We got to eat. Dad and grandma came to visit. Got a decent night's sleep. Nurse came in to do baby monitoring once, give pills another time and that's about it.

Today, they started me on a new medication to stop contractions called Indocin. I can only take it until 32 weeks and they have to monitor my amniotic fluid by ultrasound weekly b/c the meds can deplete it. i have to drink A LOT of fluids. I am not on bed rest, but I am not allowed to work as much, can't do any type of exercise, no malls, no grocery stores, try to relax and lay down as much as possible, no lifting, nothing strenous. No holding my urine in. Call if more bleeding or contractions of course. If I go into labot before 32 weeks, then we have to go to Bayfront again. If after 32 weeks, we can go back to Morton Plant where of course we would rather be for numerous reasons. I am back under the care of our OB and midwife. I have an appointment and ultrasound on Thursday. Baby is very active and doing well, so I just have to keep watching that. I am allowed to not stress or worry. my midwife said i just have to think of myself as an incubator. She said I need to reduce my work hours from 40 to 32. I just really need to relax and take it easy and not do so much. They never did find out where or why I was bleeding. I was still spotting this morning, but nothing now. They didn't find the reasons for contractions either. They discharged me about 2 this afternoon.

I am feeling OK. Mentally and emotionally drained. Tired. Glad to be home and away from the hospital, but also felt a sense of comfort and security at the hospital. We could not have gotten through any of this without God or our friends and family and our Pastor and his wife. I could not have done this without my husband. He remained calm and strong the whole time even though I know he was scared to death. I could only think about our little baby. I did not really think about my health much, but I did think about how I could not let my dear Sean not have me around anymore, he would be lost without me. I think my friends and family would probably miss me too! ;0) My mom was such a wonderful loving mother and she is flying in tomorrow to take care of me for a week. My dad visited every night and was extremely concerned and took care of Miss Allie and brought us food. we really appreciate all the phone calls and support. Now I am a little scared at what I should or should not do; my limitations. I am all bruised up from all the poking and prodding. It was crazy because Faithlynn (our pastor's wife) said that from her praying she sensed that maybe this had all happened as a way for me to realize not to stress so much and try to do so much and that I just need to relax and take it easy. While I know I did not cause all of this to happen b/c of that, it definitely could have contributed to it all.

So, we are going to take one day at a time. For each day that our little one is in my belly, the better. I can only look at it in days, not weeks, but we are hoping for a good 7 to 10 + more weeks of me being an incubator. It has definitely been rough, but God has helped us through.

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Probably Too Much Baby Talk

Nothing really new to report. This weekend has been busy, but we haven't really been doing anything if that makes sense. I guess nothing so exciting that I feel I should blog about it any way. Saturday we both worked. I got a mani/pedi and we went to K-Mart. Yep, I could go on, but as I said not important enough to blog about.

I do have a few comments though.

I figured out that it definitely was not the heartbeat we were feeling b/c I asked my midwife and she said you can't feel baby heartbeat. So that means it was hiccups and it happens almost daily to our little one. I feel bad for baby! My midwife said it was uncomfy for baby and causes lots of movement and that is true. I especially feel bad when daddy pushes the ice maker on purpose to startle baby. Baby kicks or moves every time the ice maker comes on. Poor thing!

I am learning really fast what I will and will not need for baby with having Joel around. Besides some of the obvious things like stroller, car seat, diaper pail, etc., there are a lot of things that we probably won't need. I need to remember that baby will grow so fast that there is no point in wasting tons of money on clothes and unnecessary pens and toys, etc. And there certainly is nothing wrong with hand-me-downs. I know for sure we will need a baby monitor (Allie has been working well however with baby Joel), a baby carrier (the Bjorn thing), a vibrating chair and a Boppy pillow and a nice mat to lay baby on the floor. Those items will be must haves around here for sure.

Sean was up way past me last night, feeling the belly, I was totally passed out, and apparently baby was going crazy in my tummy. I love to hear that and even nicer that it doesn't wake me up. ;)

Well, I guess I could go on with more nonsense, but I will stop now, especially since my husband is calling me. We have to finish doing our Financial Peace homework before class this evening. We have an hour.