I sit here alone this morning. That does not happen often, except for Friday Care Lift days, but I am used to those now. Not today's alone time though. And going to school alone. I have that empty feeling in my tummy and wanna cry a little too. Please, Lord, I hope we can get away from this stuff eventually and not be a wreck when we have to part. I know it is unhealthy and sounds absolutely ridiculous. No matter how much I tell myself that I am having irrational thoughts and feelings, they are still there. I know life is full of experiences and that God wanted us to go through all of the rough deployment things for one reason or another, I am not sure what that reason is though. To appreciate each other more? I don't know. All I know is I don't like all of the anxiety and panic from Sean separation. It stinks.
We are putting in an offer today on the house. There are many variables involved on what might happen and many ways for us to go about this, so we are just going to exercise all of our options. Too much to explain and don't really feel like explaining it any way. I just pray that God wants this house for us.
OK, now I am crying. And it never helps that it is that time of month. Of course!
Yesterday was not the best day. Sean and I spent most of it disagreeing about senseless stuff. I think between my period and the house hunting stuff and school and work and remodeling and a million other things that we just get all worried and stressed. We need to stop that and exhibit how we really feel about each other, which is so much love you can't even imagine. Why is it so much easier to be mean to the ones you love, but not to complete strangers? I don't get it.
Well, it is time to take myself to school. Pray my grandma's surgery goes well.